IMPERFECT PERFECTIONISTS 2018-10-06T04:32:42+00:00

Imperfect Perfectionists

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“Perfectionism is a dangerous mindset in an imperfect world.” —Robert Hillyer

Imperfect Perfectionism

You are imperfect. Of course you are, because everybody is. But what if you’re a perfectionist, too? If you’re both imperfect and perfectionistic, where does that leave you on how to feel about yourself?

Imperfect perfectionism is a contradiction and an inherently anxious state: you’re your own best frenemy. You want to love and accept yourself exactly as you are, but you also want to change, do better, and be more. How can you both believe in body-positivity and also hate your own body? How can you do good work when you’re so paralyzed that you can’t get started? How can you be compassionate if you don’t have room for mistakes in your own life?

My clients learn to confidently chill out and stop comparing themselves to an imaginary version of who they think they should be. They learn to stop chasing the pot of gold at their end of their to-do lists. They relax into their own humanness, in all its genuine and messy imperfection.

I want to work with you to untangle the confusing contradictions of imperfect perfectionism. We can calm down, get real, and take your relationship with yourself from worst frenemy to cherished friend.

Confidence Without Cockiness

Your confidence is low, and your inner bully is strong. You have a playlist of past mistakes and personal flaws on repeat in your head. You can’t let yourself feel comfortable as you are right now, right? If you did, wouldn’t that make you complacent? Stagnant? Or worse—arrogant?

My clients and I examine and challenge some of the societal, familial, and personal beliefs that keep them in a constant state of “needs improvement.” We embrace the tension between acceptance and change. We develop a new, healthy understanding of self-compassion, confidence, and wholesome humility.

Going through this process with my clients is one of the most satisfying aspects of my work. I get to joyfully witness as you learn to love the experience of being exactly yourself.

Be the Boss of Your Anxiety

Occasional anxiety is a part of life, but that chronic, every-day, in-your-bones kind of anxiety? The anxiety that shows up in your body as insomnia, stomach aches, or panic attacks? That creeps into your work as procrastination, perfectionism, and dread, or pops up in your relationships as irritability, petty arguments, and insecurity?

It doesn’t have to be that way.

Sometimes you’re not sure you want to let go of your anxiety and your self-punishment, because then you might lose your motivation. It’s the fuel that keeps you so high-achieving. Sometimes it seems like your anxiety is the thing keeping you safe from physical or emotional pain. Or maybe you can’t let your anxiety go because you just don’t know how.

You and I can get to know your anxiety, what makes it tick, and how to defuse it. I work with my clients to find relief from their physical symptoms, confidence in their work, and pleasure in their relationships.


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